Is it Okay to Date Multiple People?
Is dating multiple people sleazy and dishonest? Is it ok, even beneficial, to date multiple people at the same time to speed up the process of finding a soul mate?
It is true that the more people you communicate with, the faster you will find the right person. However, if you communicate multiple people at the same time, you will find yourself going for coffee with Jane on Monday, bowling with Mary on Wednesday and to a movie with Diana on Thursday. Unless you write down all the details of your conversations with your dates, you will be likely to forget what they have told you and your dates will think you do not care what you were told by them.
However, if you respect the feelings of the people you see and are truly looking for qualities that will lead to a long-term relationship, it may be okay not to go steady with someone as of the first date. These are some advantages to going on dates with different people when you make a decision about who is the best candidate for commitment.
- Speeding up the Process of Finding the Right Person
Some people go to a first date and the chemistry is there immediately. However, for others, they have to date a person many times (maybe over several weeks or months) to know whether there is chemistry in the air. If you immediately exclude all other people from the moment you have your first date with a person until you find that it is not a good match, you may have to go through many mini-relationships in a row before you find the right person. Going on dates with a few different good candidates around the same time helps you find out fast who’s wrong, without forcing you to wait and wait and wait to find out who’s right. - Allowing you to Compare among People
Is a person more thoughtful than the others? Is a person’s interest matching yours more? Are some people punctual? You can compare people’s personality more and easily when your memory is fresh than when you are comparing your date today to someone you dated six months ago. - Making you Self-Confident and improving your Dating Skills
Dating is very similar to looking for a job. Job hunting is never easy. Going on multiple interviews helps you to be less nervous each time and teaches you how to sell yourself to potential employers.
Similarly, by going on several first dates, you can learn to be less nervous and focus more on the person you are dating. Instead of worrying about what to say, you soon learn how to ask the right questions to help you either find the sparks of chemistry or find out that this person is just not the right one for you. Because you know that you have some other dates lined up, the pressure on this specific date simply isn’t there and you can relax a lot more.
Allowing you to have more than one date at the same time can be beneficial and enriching. When you find the right person eventually, you should pledge a commitment to date exclusively because you know that this person is the best among all the other people you have dated.